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In honour of rebuilding and reclaiming your inner goddess; your divine feminine I thought it may be handy and helpful to every so often share a short list of "10 ways to".Let's face it: life is busy; we are busy, and truth be told that is more often than not part of the many &nbsp;reasons why we slowly but surely start to loose ourselves, our confidence, our relationship with ourselves.&nbsp;Though you may find that you have no energy at the end of the day, or too much in a hurry in the morning, it's important to make time to pour back into yourself. If this is something you don't do or hardly ever do, start off by allowing 5 minutes each morning and 5 minutes each evening just to yourself. This could be something as simplistic as closing your eyes, fiocus on deep breaths and repeating affirmations tgo yourself with your right hand on your chest, or looking in the mirror and telling yourself "I Love You" repeatedly for 5 minutes (it feels silly at first however I guarante after the first week it get's easier).This is something I teach in my up and coming Sensual Embodiment Workshops. Should you be interested, please sens me a WhatsApp so that I can share the details with you.&nbsp;Below you will find 10 points on How to Build Self Trust:<ul><li>Practice standing up for yourself</li><li>Set and honor your boundaries</li><li>Validate your needs and feelings</li><li>Keep a daily promise</li><li>Listen to your body (e.g. when you are tired, rest)</li><li>Let go of things that harm you/no longer serve you</li><li>Speak positively and supportively to yourself</li><li>Forgive yourself for past mistakes</li><li>Practice identifying your intuition</li><li>Remember all the good decisions you've made</li></ul>I look forward to sharing a few more "10 ways" to help whomever may need it. Sending LoveAlli

10 ways to Build Self Trust

<h2>Today I’m having a day..<img id="ze5rxhtqtpm1hjimwc" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/edlvTGSHHUPE8uNPnOL5weyYdaJUWGsfQzfA1lCMW8VbvwjS1Rqfi3SfvwKAxiHM.jpg" alt="black laptop computer beside white ceramic mug on brown wooden table" title="black laptop computer beside white ceramic mug on brown wooden table" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-sm md:rounded-md lg:rounded-lg" data-corners="default" data-aspect="16:9" data-caption="" data-positionx="undefined" data-positiony="undefined" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/edlvTGSHHUPE8uNPnOL5weyYdaJUWGsfQzfA1lCMW8VbvwjS1Rqfi3SfvwKAxiHM.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 16/9; object-position: center center;" style="font-family: var(--body-fontFamily); font-size: calc(16px * var(--body-fontSize, 1)); font-style: var(--body-fontStyle, normal); -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%; aspect-ratio: 16 / 9; object-position: center center;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: calc(16px * var(--body-fontSize, 1)); font-style: var(--body-fontStyle, normal); -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;" data-mce-style="font-family: inherit; font-size: calc(16px * var(--body-fontSize, 1)); font-style: var(--body-fontStyle, normal); -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;">I never really share my personal things on social media and few truly know me, my past, anything about my family and my home life.</h2>I have worked so hard to be the woman I am today. I have screwed up so many times&nbsp; I have fallen so many times I have second guessed myself so many times I have made choices I should maybe not have made yet I love who I am, who I have become and what I have overcome. Few know that I come from a past of multiple encounters of sexual and physical abuse. Since I was little.I was brought up in a home where I was told since a little girl that I wasn’t good enough. That I had “brain issues”, that I was an “idiot” that I don’t know how to use my brain.&nbsp; I wax “destined to end up on the street” Our upbringing was mostly spent doing chores, raising my smaller siblings, part time work, and loads and loads of betrayal, abuse and neglect.From parent and family to the people I thought I could rely on at school and work, to “friends”. I married way too young and struggled with severe darkness, depression, and health issues. I was diagnosed with Lupus, arthritis, liver issues, iron deficiency, alopecia, severe stomach and skin ulcers, polycystic ovary syndrome, hormonal imbalances to name a few. I stopped working in a very successful investment banking career to raise my two beautiful children, and had to find myself after 8 years start all over again from the bottom of that career ladder. I moved countries with no help and eventually made the decision to leave my marriage. This again affected my circles of people thought I could trust and rely on and I ended up by myself with my two children, stating again. I recreated myself once more. Studying psychology part time focussing on trauma and sexual abuse in children then in adults. I then started studying sexology. I started a successful business in arts and modelling and became a published model, and recognised abroad for the genre I specialised I photography art. This by chance lead me straight into the lap of the evil dark side of our current world of exploitation, femicide, human trafficking, child prostitution, sexual assault and sexual abuse. With the help of the network with my industry I truly believe little changes were made though I had to get out that hole as that was eating me alive and I became severely depressed as I could not save nor help most women and children. I continued doing my undergrad in psychology however that slowed right down. After great losses, disappointments, betrayal and grief I found myself once more at rock bottom. Again, I picked myself up and started yet again a new chapter. I sit today and reflect this journey as I sit alone and face uncomfortable situations that will ultimately lead to different choices that have to be made. The confidence and love that I have in myself and that in other women, seems to make some people feel insecure or uncomfortable. I’m often “told/insulted/accused/judged” for the past I had. And it is so very strange to me as there is really very little to be judged for and more so very little to hide. I award successful in pretty all areas of my life and I’m so proud of that. I have shown up in love, compassion, understanding and trust with every relationship in my life. I move, walk, sit and exist in my feminine sensual power and I am very aware of my worth and value. And I aim to shine these qualities so bright that everyone that comes near me walks away with at least a little of that. Reflecting where I can change and better myself, but also recognising that I should not have to tolerate disrespectful behaviour. My kindness and tolerance should not be confused with weakness and stupidity. I grieve the people that no longer serves me and the times we had. I grieve the space and time I never claimed from those that thought little of me. But most of all I grieve the loss of the parts of myself I let go because others felt insecure with those parts of me, or didn’t think I was a priority as I believe I am. There is no shame in feeling&nbsp; There is no shame in being&nbsp; And there is certainly no shame in being 100% true to yourself - unapologetically ♥️ I make no excuses for the fabulous, sensual and loving person I am that was at any given time a pension administrator, investment risk assessor, property manager, sales manager, key accounts manager, fitness instructor, trainer, councillor, artistic and glamour model, ambassador and activist, photographer, mother, friend, sister, partner and an intellectually hungry student. My life purpose is to shine and my legacy is to leave as much value with every person I meet. Unashamedly&nbsp; Unapologetically&nbsp; I celebrate MEI share this with you, as I sit here … with it With the hurt, with the sadness, with the loneliness. I share this because I know I’m strong and will rise once more every time I stumble, every time I fall, every time a stone is cast, and everytime the abandonment shows up. I also know that I’m not the only person going through this Going through difficult moments, decisions that have to be made or just having to heal. You’re welcome to reach out and chat to me should you need an ear or shoulder. Otherwise please know you’re not alone and it will be okay. It will be okayLove&nbsp;Alli&nbsp;

No Shame

<h2>My vision : Transformation in my studio...</h2>Welcome to my page, where sensuality meets empowerment through the art of boudoir photography. My name is Allison-Ann Montgomery - however you can call me Alli, and I am thrilled to share with you a unique space dedicated to celebrating the beauty, strength, and resilience of women.<h3>A Passion Born from Advocacy</h3> My journey into the world of boudoir photography is deeply rooted in my past experiences as a creative, model and artist where I stumbled across the unthinkable dark side of the adult industry and heinous crimes against girls and women. This encouraged me to become an activist against gender-based violence and femicide. For a few years I worked alongside those in private and public sectors to help combat the harrowing statistics that highlight the severe and pervasive issues faced by women in South Africa. These efforts were driven by a profound commitment to ending the cycle of violence and supporting survivors in their quest for justice and healing.<h3>The Urgent Need for Empowerment</h3> South Africa grapples with alarming rates of violence against women, and these statistics paint a stark picture of the challenges many face daily:1. Domestic Violence is a pervasive issue, encompassing physical, emotional, and psychological abuse within homes and intimate relationships. It affects countless women and often goes unreported. 2. Sexual Assault and Rape remain severe and prevalent crimes, with rape being a particularly significant concern. The trauma associated with these acts can have lasting effects on victims' lives. 3. Murder, frequently linked to intimate partner violence or domestic disputes, presents a sobering reality. The high homicide rates among women reflect a critical need for intervention and support. 4. Human Trafficking is another grave issue, with women and girls often falling prey to exploitation for forced labor or sexual purposes. This underlines the importance of continued vigilance and advocacy. 5. Robbery and Assault also impact women, though these crimes are generally more prevalent in urban settings and may not always directly correlate with gender-specific issues. <h3>The Hidden Impact: Childhood Trauma and Societal Pressures</h3> What many women might not realize is that the impact of these crimes extends far beyond the immediate experiences of violence. Many women who face such trauma as adults have also been subjected to childhood traumas involving sexual abuse and domestic violence.The reality is that the effects of such experiences often ripple through our lives in ways we might not see immediately. Few are aware just how many of their friends, family members, work colleagues, and even the women they pass by day-to-day have endured these challenges. Childhood abuse and domestic violence can shape a person's experiences and perceptions throughout their lives, influencing their relationships, self-esteem, and overall well-being.<h3>Beyond the Lens: Addressing Self-Confidence and Self-Love</h3> My journey as a boudoir photographer is not solely about capturing beautiful images; it encompasses the daily struggles that women face with self-confidence and self-love. Many women grow up in environments where they are made to feel shame simply for being who they are or as the result of traumas and abuse. This shame often stems from societal expectations, past traumas, and the harsh realities of gender-based violence.<blockquote>As I transitioned from "activism" to searching for a vehicle, tool or method to empower women, my mission remained clear: to create a space where women can rediscover their inner strength and beauty. Boudoir photography is not just about capturing alluring images; it’s about empowering women to embrace their bodies and reclaim their narratives.</blockquote>My passion for photography, modeling, and celebrating women naturally led me to establish my business in female sensual boudoir photography.In every session, my aim is to celebrate each woman’s unique essence and resilience. Through the lens, I seek to highlight the beauty that exists within every individual, regardless of past traumas or current challenges. My work is designed to offer a transformative experience, helping women feel cherished and confident.<h3>Your Journey with Me</h3>If you’ve been affected by the issues I’ve mentioned or are simply looking to celebrate your own unique beauty, I invite you to join me on this empowering journey. Each session is a personal and private experience, crafted to make you feel celebrated and valued, in a private, intimate and safe space.OR why don't you share your journey along our community for ladies only that can be found via my Facebook page?Thank you for visiting my page and supporting a business that stands for both artistic expression and meaningful change. Together, we can continue to shine a light on women’s strength and resilience, creating art that uplifts and empowers.Feel free to reach out to me with any questions or to book your own transformative boudoir session. Let’s embark on this journey of self-love and empowerment together.Love,Alli Maaske<a title="Facebook" href="http://www.facebook.com/allicattie.maaske" target="_blank" data-mce-href="http://www.facebook.com/allicattie.maaske" rel="noopener">Follow Alli on Facebook</a><a title="Instagram" href="https://www.instagram.com/art.by.allim" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-mce-href="https://www.instagram.com/art.by.allim">Follow Alli on Instagram</a><a title="TikTok" href="https://www.tiktok.com/@artbyallim" target="_blank" rel="noopener" data-mce-href="https://www.tiktok.com/@artbyallim">Follwo Alli on TikTok</a>

From Activism to Empowerment

What a time we live in....Surely I'm not the only woman feeling like every now and then. I'm losing it. And quite often I have to stop and catch myself....More often than not I catch myself forcing a smile, and that internal monkey brain automatically tells me to "get a grip"... "remember big girls don't cry".... "can't allow the world to see you are weak"... Then suddenly you just lose it and feel like a maniac psycho because it all became too much!In our ever-changing world, managing our emotions sometimes feel like an uphill battle. From the pressures of work and family to the constant bombardment of news and social media, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. For us women, these challenges can be even more pronounced due to societal expectations and gender-specific stressors. However, understanding and managing our emotions is crucial for our mental and physical well-being.&nbsp;I am very focussed currently on not only getting onto of “losing” it, however also on better managing emotions…Here’s a guide to help you navigate your emotions in this unbalanced world:<h3>1. Acknowledge Your Emotions</h3>The first step in managing your emotions is to acknowledge them. Whether you’re feeling anxious, angry, or sad, it’s important to recognise these feelings without judgment. Suppressing emotions can lead to increased stress and can impact your physical health. Take a moment to sit with your feelings, understand where they’re coming from, and accept them as a natural part of being human.<h3>2. Practice Mindfulness</h3>Mindfulness is a powerful tool for managing emotions. It involves staying present and fully engaging with the current moment. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, and mindful movement can help you stay grounded and reduce emotional reactivity. Set aside a few minutes each day to practice mindfulness. Over time, it can lead to greater emotional stability and resilience.<h3>3. Connect with Others</h3>Human connection is vital for emotional well-being. Reach out to friends, family, or support groups to share your feelings and experiences. Talking to others can provide new perspectives and help you feel less isolated. Remember, it’s okay to ask for help when you need it. Building a strong support network can make a significant difference in how you manage your emotions.<h3>4. Set Boundaries</h3>In an unbalanced world, it’s essential to set boundaries to protect your emotional health. This might mean limiting your exposure to negative news, reducing time spent on social media, or saying no to commitments that drain your energy. Setting boundaries allows you to prioritise your well-being and focus on what truly matters to you.<h3>5. Engage in Self-Care</h3>Self-care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. Make time for activities that bring you joy and relaxation, whether it’s reading a book, taking a bath, or going for a walk in nature. Regular self-care practices can recharge your energy and improve your emotional resilience. Remember, taking care of yourself enables you to take better care of others.<h3>6. Focus on What You Can Control</h3>In an unpredictable world, it’s easy to feel helpless. Focus on what you can control rather than what you can’t. This might include your daily routine, your reactions to situations, or how you spend your free time. By concentrating on what you can manage, you can create a sense of stability and reduce feelings of anxiety.<h3>7. Seek Professional Help</h3>If your emotions feel overwhelming or persistent, consider seeking professional help. Therapists and counsellors can provide strategies and support tailored to your specific needs. Don’t hesitate to reach out for professional assistance if you need it. Taking this step is a sign of strength and a commitment to your well-being.<h3>8. Cultivate Gratitude</h3>Practicing gratitude can shift your focus from what’s wrong to what’s right in your life. Each day, take a moment to reflect on the things you’re thankful for. This simple practice can improve your mood and foster a more positive outlook. Gratitude helps you appreciate the good, even amidst challenges.Navigating your emotions in an unbalanced world is a continuous journey.&nbsp;By acknowledging your feelings, practicing mindfulness, connecting with others, setting boundaries, engaging in self-care, focusing on what you can control, seeking professional help, and cultivating gratitude, you can build emotional resilience and find balance. Remember, it’s okay to feel what you feel, and it’s okay to take steps to manage those feelings.&nbsp;Prioritise your emotional well-being and give yourself the compassion and care you deserve.

Navigating Your Emotions in an Unbalanced World

In a world that often teaches us to seek validation externally, the most profound journey we can embark upon is the one towards self-respect and self-love. <blockquote>While it may sound cliché, the essence of these concepts goes beyond mere words – it’s about fostering a deep sense of appreciation and acceptance for oneself, flaws and all. </blockquote>Self-love and self-respect are both crucial components of a healthy self-image, but they manifest in slightly different ways. Self-love is about cherishing and nurturing yourself, acknowledging your worth, and embracing who you are, flaws and all. It involves treating yourself with kindness, compassion, and acceptance, regardless of your imperfections or mistakes. Self-love is about recognising your inherent value and taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being because you believe you deserve it.On the other hand, self-respect is about honouring your boundaries, values, and beliefs. It involves setting healthy boundaries with others, standing up for yourself, and refusing to tolerate behaviour that undermines your dignity or self-worth. Self-respect means recognising your worth and refusing to settle for less than you deserve in relationships, work, and other areas of life.In essence, self-love is about how you feel about yourself internally, while self-respect is about how you allow others to treat you and how you assert yourself in the world. Both are essential for cultivating a strong sense of self and living a fulfilling life.So, how can one begin this transformative journey?Below I've created 8 pointers towards your personal journey to achieve self-love &amp; self-respect<h3>1. Acknowledge Your Worth: </h3>Self-respect begins with recognizing your inherent value as a human being. Understand that you are worthy of love and respect simply by virtue of existing. Embrace your uniqueness and strengths, and be gentle with yourself in moments of weakness.<h3>2. Set Boundaries:</h3>Boundaries are essential for maintaining self-respect. Learn to say no to things that compromise your values or make you uncomfortable. Surround yourself with people who uplift and support you, and distance yourself from those who undermine your worth.<h3>3. Practice Self-Compassion:</h3>Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. We all make mistakes and face challenges – it’s how we respond to them that matters. Instead of berating yourself for imperfections, practice self-compassion and self-forgiveness.<h3>4. Nurture Your Passions:</h3>Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. Whether it’s painting, writing, gardening, or dancing, make time for the things that nourish your soul. Cultivating your passions not only boosts self-esteem but also fosters a deeper connection with yourself.<h3>5. Mindfulness and Self-Reflection:</h3>Take time to pause and reflect on your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Mindfulness practices such as meditation or journaling can help you become more aware of your inner world. Through self-reflection, you can gain insights into patterns and beliefs that may be holding you back from fully embracing yourself.<h3>6. Practice Gratitude:</h3>Gratitude has the power to shift your perspective and cultivate a sense of abundance. Take time each day to acknowledge the things you’re grateful for, whether it’s the support of loved ones, the beauty of nature, or the simple pleasures of life. Gratitude reminds you of the richness that already exists within and around you.<h3>7. Seek Growth, Not Perfection:</h3>Instead of striving for perfection, focus on personal growth and self-improvement. Embrace the journey of becoming the best version of yourself, knowing that it’s okay to stumble along the way. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and remember that growth is a continuous process.<h3>8. Seek Professional Help if Needed:</h3>Sometimes, achieving self-respect and self-love may require support from a therapist or counselor. There’s no shame in seeking professional help to work through deeper issues or past traumas that may be impacting your self-esteem.In essence, cultivating self-respect and self-love is a lifelong journey that requires patience, compassion, and dedication. It’s about embracing your humanity – with all its complexities, strengths, and vulnerabilities – and learning to love yourself unconditionally. As you embark on this journey, remember that you are deserving of love, respect, and kindness – from yourself, above all.I'd love to hear from you... have you got questions, or need more guidance on this topic?

Cultivating Self-Respect & Self-Love

<figure id="figure-93j1mvvvalwmbg8m9" class=""><img id="93j1mvvvalwmbg8m9" src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/17J3IeuTiOAiPDNhSigWxMbtDVAHUiOcGDPLWiKm14ALz16SixMSqwdOW4vKnvgD.jpg" alt="Colour photo of a women lying on a bed pulling her stockings on laughing in a boudoir studio" title="Colour photo of a women lying on a bed pulling her stockings on laughing in a boudoir studio" class="object-cover bg-gray-100 rounded-sm md:rounded-md lg:rounded-lg" style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: 50% 45%;" data-corners="default" data-aspect="1:1" data-caption="" data-positionx="50%" data-positiony="45%" data-fullwidth="false" data-mce-src="https://cdn.durable.co/blocks/17J3IeuTiOAiPDNhSigWxMbtDVAHUiOcGDPLWiKm14ALz16SixMSqwdOW4vKnvgD.jpg" data-mce-style="aspect-ratio: 1/1; object-position: 50% 45%;"></figure><h2>Embrace your Inner Wisdom</h2>How many times would you say: "I knew something was off" or "Looking back I knew I should haver listened to my gut". Your intution as woman is so incredibly powerful. Think of it as the GPS on the way anywhere. In fact; think of it as a super power that knows what's going to happen in the very near future....In the whirlwind of everyday life, it’s easy to get caught up in the noise of external influences, drowning out the gentle whispers of our inner knowing. Yet, our intuition, that deep-seated gut feeling, holds profound wisdom that can guide us toward fulfilment and authenticity. Honouring your intuition is not just about listening to your instincts; it’s about trusting them and allowing them to shape your path. Here’s why tuning into your intuition is crucial and how it can transform your life.Why Intuition Matters:1. **Authenticity**: Your intuition is like a compass pointing you towards your true self, helping you align with your values and desires.2. **Clarity**: Amidst the chaos of life, your intuition provides clarity, cutting through the noise and guiding you towards what truly matters.3. **Empowerment**: Listening to your intuition empowers you to make decisions with confidence, trusting that you’re following the right path for you.4. **Alignment**: Your intuition is attuned to your highest good, leading you towards experiences and opportunities that align with your soul’s journey.5. **Self-Trust**: Honouring your intuition fosters a deeper sense of self-trust, empowering you to rely on your inner wisdom rather than seeking external validation.<h3>10 Pointers to Honour Your Intuition:</h3>1. Quite the Mind: Create space for intuition to emerge by quieting the noise of the mind through practices like meditation, journaling, or spending time in nature.2. Pay Attention to Body Signals: Tune into your body’s signals—those subtle sensations or feelings in your gut—that often serve as the first whispers of intuition.3. Trust Your Feelings: Honour your emotions as messengers from your intuition. Pay attention to how you feel in different situations, as your emotions often carry valuable insights.4. Reflect on Past Experiences: Take time to reflect on past experiences where you followed (or ignored) your intuition. What were the outcomes? Use these insights to inform future decisions.5. Practice Mindfulness: Cultivate mindfulness in your daily life, staying present in the moment and attuned to the subtle cues and nudges of your intuition.6. Follow Your Curiosity: Your intuition often speaks through curiosity and excitement. Follow the things that pique your interest, as they may lead you towards meaningful paths.7. Listen to Your Dreams: Pay attention to your dreams, as they can offer valuable insights and messages from your subconscious mind.8. Seek Solitude: Spend time alone to connect with your inner voice without external distractions, allowing your intuition to speak clearly.9. Be Open-Minded: Approach life with an open mind, willing to entertain the unconventional and explore new possibilities that may resonate with your intuition.10. Practice Patience: Trust that your intuition will reveal itself in its own time. Be patient and allow the guidance to unfold naturally.By honouring your intuition and incorporating these practices into your life, you’ll cultivate a deeper sense of self-awareness, clarity, and empowerment. Embrace the wisdom within you, and let it illuminate the path to a more authentic and fulfilling life.

Blog

10 ways to Build Self Trust

No Shame

From Activism to Empowerment

Navigating Your Emotions in an Unbalanced World

Cultivating Self-Respect & Self-Love

10 Ways to Honour your Intuition